In the Moment

As I wrote about in one of my first posts, my pregnancy was very difficult. Although everything did end up being OK in the end, those 12 weeks of hospitals/bedrest were the worst 12 weeks of my life. I'm so very, very thankful that things did turn out as they did, however I do not sugarcoat my feelings when it comes to my pregnancy story. It is now three years later and although I know that if I want another baby, we should probably at least be thinking about it (as I'm definitely not getting any younger), I am still terrified of being pregnant again.

However, I do still try to see the good things from that chapter of my life. Aside from the obvious (that despite everything, we did make it through that time and today have a spunky, adorable and absolutely loved almost 3-year-old) I think my pregnancy did give me unique perspective on some things - that is, not to take any moment with little man for granted.

There are definitely moments as a mother that still take my breath away. Sometimes it is just snuggling with little man at night when the house is dark and quiet, or splashing water around in the tub with him and hearing him laugh. It is during these moments when an alarm will sound in my head, and suddenly I will just know that I should just enjoy that moment for what it is and forget about the dishes, the dog, etc. I'm suddenly reminded just how close we were to not having little man with us. I'm thankful that if anything, my pregnancy taught me to see these moments for what they are and to recognize that I am in one of those moments in life that little man and I will treasure even when he is a grown man with children himself.

I had one of these moments Saturday morning. My husband had gotten up early to run some errands, leaving little man and I snoozing. As usual, little man woke up before I did, and thus began our usual weekend ritual:

"MAAAAAMMMMEEEEEEEE!" He yells from his bedroom.

"mmmmAAAAmmmmEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

I then always open his bedroom door and am greeted by a giggle and a smile, and then a big hug as I pick him up off of his bed.

Only this morning, as I was enjoying my morning bear hug, little man pointed to my bedroom and said "I go sit in Mommy's bed. Watch catoooooons."

I thought that sounded like quite the deal.

So we piled back into my bed. Little man gladly slipped under the comforter and snuggled into a pillow next to me.

And so we sat there on a quiet Saturday morning, just little man and I snuggling in my bed, watching cartoons. I was surprised little man was so content to just snuggle. Usually on the weekends he is awake and ready to play once his feet hit the floor. But not that morning. I knew that this was one of those moments, and so I took in every snuggle and giggle.

But, just as all things in life, good things must come to an end. Which brings to me to an explanation of the strange little picture up above. As little man and I were finishing an episode of Mickey Mouse Playhouse, I decided to do a bit of channel surfing to see what other cartoons were on. As little man and I flipped through the channels, he suddenly said "I watch that."

It was a cartoon that at first I thought looked cute. It had little animals running around, not Army commandos shooting each other or strange scary alien creatures, so I figured it was OK to stop channel surfing.

But then I realized the little animals were somewhat strange. They did not have fur. They had little bits of paper. They were piñatas. Strange, talking, piñatas.

Yes. Piñatas.

And then a giant bull piñata attacked another piñata. It was like I was watching an episode of WWF - with piñatas.

Fortunately, I wasn't the only one who was confused.

I looked over at little man and he had the same look of confusion. He also didn't know whether to laugh, cry or be deeply, deeply disturbed.

And with that, I knew our moment had ended.

"Want to go make some waffles?" I asked little man.

"Yeah, I want awwwfull," he said, grinning as he jumped out of my bed.